Tough times
Been laid off recently? That punch to the gut feeling is real, and it hurts. But, if you’ve recently been retrenched, had your role disestablished, been made redundant or experienced job cuts, here’s what you need to know: you’re not the problem, you’re the solution.
A few years back, when I first got told that my role had been disestablished, I translated that as: “you’re not good at your job”, “you suck”, “you’re worthless”. That was after fifteen years with the same organisation where I had had several opportunities to grow, learn and lead. And yet, my inner filter couldn’t see beyond the fact that I was not good enough to hold on to a job.
Fast forward to 2024. “Sorry, but your role has been disestablished”. What do I hear now? Or, more importantly, what do I tell myself and what is my response. This time, my response was calm, composed even and it enabled me to very quickly ask myself: “Ok, let’s consider my options and decide what to do next.”
A massively different response to just a few years back. What’s remarkable about this response is not only the response itself, but the speed at which it came. It was almost immediate. The natural questions which come to mind are: why was my response so significantly different and how did I get to this stage so quickly?
How I turned things around
Firstly, I had been through this before. I’d faced the dreaded: “Can we talk for a minute?” conversation. I’d been through the soul searching and figuring out what I was meant to be doing with my life, and, importantly, I’d dealt with the self-doubt. When I look back on that period of my life, I can summarise the process (yes, it’s a process although not necessarily linear) into five stages:
Hover: observing my life as though I had a time-agnostic helicopter-view of my existence and could see my past, present and potential futures. Hovering over my life, I was able to see that, while I was upset about the job, there were other unrelated things from my past I was bitter about. It also gave me insight into what parts of me I wasn’t really tapping into.
Hold: considering what may have been holding me back, what it was that I was most grateful for, what was dearest to my heart. By bringing all these into my consciousness, I was able to be honest with myself and be clear about the values which grounded me, the strengths I had been blessed with and my reason for being.
Harness: reflecting on what I already held meant I was able to harness that to envision my potential futures. This was super-enlightening and lightening! It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders because it gave me real options where I could actually see myself doing and being.
Hasten: taking the first step. Quickly! I say quickly because it took me several years to actually do this and that was unnecessary and I had squandered time in the process. I learned that taking just one step in the direction of my vision meant I’d started and there was no turning back.
Harvest: reap the rewards, appreciate the growth I’d attained and gather the insights I’d gained to further enhance my next steps. I cannot fully explain how relieving it feels to know you’re doing what you’re meant to be doing. Then to be able to help others do the same is the most rewarding thing.
Hindsight’s a beautiful thing. If the younger me had the older me as their coach, helping me learn then what I knew now, I’d have wasted a lot less time on thinking that I was the problem. If older me coach had been there earlier, I would have figured out much sooner that not only was I not the problem but that I also held the solutions, I’d have been so much further on my journey.
Take some action
Don’t waste time like I did - start your journey today. If you’re anything like me and despise rework and have a serious allergy to re-inventing what’s already proved to work, then stop wasting time on trying to figure this out on your own. The five-step formula I shared works. I know because I’ve lived it.
Do you need help going from feeling like you’re the problem to believing that you’re the solution? Let’s take the next step together and discover the solutions you already hold.
