My Three Pet Peeves (and Why They Matter More Than You Think)
Those who’ve worked closely with me know I have a very particular allergy: Times New Roman font. Yes, strange. I know. Thank you for your judgment.
But while that’s a harmless quirk, there are three deeper pet peeves of mine that hit harder. And no, these aren’t the kind of annoyances you can fix with a quick font change or running them through a PDF editor. They’re behaviours and attitudes I’ve come to see — in myself and others — that quietly erode growth, potential and trust.
Let’s name (and shame) them.
1. Wasted potential
Maybe I’m just getting older. But there’s something gut-wrenching about seeing people — especially young people — who have so much going for them, just… coast, cruise, chill.
They might have:
A safe, warm roof over their heads
Food security
Access to education, high-speed internet and mobile tech
Natural gifts — whether athletic, academic, creative or social
Inherited privilege — wealth, family standing, networks, etc.
And yet, their waking hours are consumed by endless scrolling, passive consumption, (gainless?) gaming, following trends or trying to impress people who won’t even remember them next week.
I’m not saying we all have to hustle 24/7. Rest is important. Joy matters. But I can’t help wondering:
What if we redirected just 10% of our device time toward building, creating, contributing?
The world would be so different. And so would we.
2. Personal dishonesty
I’m not just talking about lying to others — though that’s an issue too. I’m talking about personal dishonesty: the way we lie to ourselves. Psychologists call it minimising, obscuration, cognitive dissonance. I just call it denial.
It’s when we tell ourselves half-truths so we can stay comfortable. It’s convincing ourselves we’re in the right when we know, deep down, we’re not. It’s editing our own story so we don’t have to face discomfort, guilt or the need to change and thereby empowering the victim inside of us. Feel-me-sorry much?
But every time we do this — even subtly — we lose a little clarity. And over time, that fog of self-deception stops us from growing.
3. Arrogance
This is my #1 pet hate — because I see how easily it takes root and how destructive it can be.
Arrogance wears many faces:
The loud voice that refuses to listen
The subtle smirk that says, “I know better”
The inability to admit fault, even when the evidence is clear
The sheer pain of saying that “s” word when we' know we’ve done someone wrong.
It’s the belief that my truth is the truth. That I’m above learning, above growing, above question.
And it often stems from insecurity — but manifests as superiority. And wasting copious amounts of time online, following certain influencers, trends, etc. only seem to re-enforce this notion that being the Alpha is the only aim in life.
Why these three?
I’ve asked myself why these things get to me so much. And I’ve realised: They challenge two of my core values — gratitude and service.
When potential is wasted, gratitude is forgotten.
When we’re dishonest with ourselves, we avoid the responsibility to serve.
When arrogance takes over, it becomes about us, not what we can contribute.
And here's the thing, these aren’t fixed traits. They’re habits. Patterns. Defences. They come from somewhere in our past — but they don’t need to be part of our future.
What happens when we challenge these in ourselves? We start to see changes that matter:
✔️ Emotional and spiritual growth
✔️ Greater humility and empathy
✔️ Stronger personal accountability
✔️ Improved focus and productivity
✔️ Deeper relationships
✔️ Increased contribution to others
✔️ A clearer, more aligned sense of purpose
✔️ Overall wellbeing.
This is the real work. And it’s hard. But it’s worth it.
Final thought: Pet peeves or personal checkpoints?
If any of this landed with you — even uncomfortably — take that as a nudge. These peeves aren’t just things that bug me. They’re signs. They point to areas that, when transformed, lead to real growth. But none of it is possible without two things:
Willingness to change
Awareness that change is needed.
I've written before about what it takes to achieve sustainable behavioural change. According to Dr Michie et al's COM-B model for behavioural change, the willingness to change is only one ingredient identified as the motivation. The opportunity for change can start with at least having an awareness. And, finally, it is systems, processes, frameworks etc. that constitute the capability required for sustainable behavioural change. This is where coaching comes in.
👣 What about you?
Which of these three do you see in yourself — or the people around you? What would shift for you if that changed?
If you're ready to explore that, let’s talk.
Not because I have all the answers. But because asking better questions can change everything.
